8 May 2016 - Mother's Day

Today is Mother's day and it's the 7th year that i celebrate this day as a mother myself.

I messaged Jervis during lunch time to ask if everyone is available for dinner tonight and he told me our mother is throwing a tantrum. Felt xianz the moment i hear that. It has been so many years but somehow my mum's temper and black face always affect me. I do not understand why is my mother always so unhappy with life. I have never seen her truly happy since i was a child. Her mood swings were frequent and she always took it out on me. I used to think marriage and family took its toil on her. We were her burden. I was aware of this the day she said she wanted to divorce my dad and she only wanted Jervis..the youngest. But deep in my heart, i knew she loves Jervoise and me as well. I just did.

Anyway, we went ahead to mum's place for dinner. We bought food from a tze char stall in Bedok Reservoir and I was looking forward to a joyous dinner. There were sweet and sour meat, nai bai, chicken wings, ginger sliced fish, prawn balls, pork ribs, pork strips, sze chuan vegetables and eggs. Yummy right. My mum sat at the other end of the table and Jfk passed her the eggs. She replied "i don't eat eggs". After 5mins, she stood up and reached for the eggs.  If Jfk was livid, he didn't show it at the dinner table.

I felt caught in between my mum and my husband. It hurts every time we quarrel about each other's family. Over the years, i have learnt to deal with it. But it does hurt me. I am not immune to hurt and pain but i choose not to let it affect me in any way. I want to be happy and i really believe that life is too precious to waste it feeling negative.

I love you Mummy.

Happy Mother's Day to all!