12 June 2016 - Living a lie

Recently, our walk with the Boey family has gotten closer. All because i babysit Lucas in March for a day this year. We went for dinner and then a trip to Legoland was decided right there and then. And we met each other a few times in school every morning.  And they invited us to their new place for a swim in May. We went to Johor for dinner after the swim and then a Bintan trip was decided. Right there. WOW

And secrets poured out. I can't believe what i am hearing..seriously. I hate lies. I know sometimes white lies are inevitable when we don't wish to hurt others.  But living a lie is another thing altogether.  I cannot be friends if our relationship is not build on honesty and trust. And so, i held a private debate and convinced myself, we are not friends yet. And because we are not friends, he does not need to tell us all about himself. There is no obligation to do so.

But i feel sad. That people could live like that. Life is too short and too precious to be so miserable. There are many people living in war zones, who just want to live a normal life. We are living a normal life that many people around the world are not able to.  Yet, we got greedy. We harbour thoughts of feeling empty, feeling unloved etc etc. In short, it seems to me just plain greedy. Yes, we should all upgrade ourselves and strives to live a good life. But there is a thin line between being greedy and being ungrateful. I need to think about this statement. Because i could be wrong.

Anyway, i have been cooking these 2 days. We had dinner at home on a Saturday and Sunday night. It is cost effective to cook. And i feel a great sense of satisfaction. Cooked with love. :)

I gave my neighbour some soup and auntie taught me a trick to boil the peanuts separately before i add it into the rest of the soup. That way, the soup would be clear, instead of looking milky. Hehe And i have learnt to tell the butcher i want pork ribs with less blood, to cook soup for 3 persons.  He chop up the pork ribs into nice small pieces, 9 pieces for $4.50. That is a steal! That is about 4 rounds of soup making hahaha

And in the wet market, i can buy 3 potatoes, 1 tomato and 1 onion. In the exact quantity that i need just as how i planned my meals. Unlike in NTUC, i need to buy a whole packet. By the time i cook again the following week, the potatoes have sprouts growing on them! And my onions almost became plants!

Ahhh the perils of a housewife. It is not easy for SAHMs. I salute them. I would much prefer to put on make up, dress up nicely and go to work. It would be extremely fantastic if we all have 28 days annual leaves for time to stone. :)

Annual leaves remind me of HC, an asshole at work. At first, it exasperates me to be at the receiving end of the stick of his sick humour.  He pretends to use this "noncommittal, i am clueless, harmless, smiley face" to people to do things for him. But when he faces Heidi, who looks serious all the time and no-nonsense, he uses a business-like method to get her to do things. With Siyun, he uses the "sugar coated" method because he is unsure of her what she is really thinking about, if she will backstab him. And with Kwan, he has stereotyped him as beneath him. Because he has tested Kwan's tolerance by "suaning" him, one level higher each time. And Kwan has never flare up. I think he should, because HC is a coward. But then again HC will also backstab.. With Benedict, he is neutral because Benedict is harmless.

I reckon that the only way to deal with him is to confuse him as well. Blow hot and cold so he will never figure out what method to use when he talks to me. Put him at the altar and treat him like "a hero" and then the next day/time, look at him as if he is dirt.  This is literally slapping him on the right side of his face and kissing the left side of his face. But shit, people like him tires me. I loathe him. He puts a value tag on everyone and he has no qualms about making use of others to attain his objective. Why is he my colleague? Damn, just why? I hate it when he asked "is it my problem?"

Anyway.. it is people like him that makes some other people look like angels.