15 March, 2008 - Purple Nostalgia

I did not go for community work today because we had to help JT shift house. Their matrimonial house will be sold end of March so he has to move all his stuff back to his parents' place. It felt strange to be standing in this house today. The last time i stepped foot here was like almost three or four CNYs ago...when their marriage has already soured but at least both of them were still staying together. AK shifted back to her mum place about three years ago and both never looked back since...signed the separation papers, both moved on with their lives with their own special someone. Divorce papers were signed this year. Irreconcilable differences and infidelity...both equally painful. It is a chore to be in a tumultuous relationship. There is plenty of hurt, lies, tears and whatever other emotions that let your heart feels pain. Perhaps both of them should never have got back together when they broke up a year or two before the marriage. Getting back together for old times sake is a big mistake. JT was devastated when they broke up and he tried all ways to win AK back. After a year of trying, they patched back but i supposed what's not meant to be will never be.

JT is a sentimental guy. I noticed that the house still carries traces of AK...the purple curtains were still hanging by the window, the little lamp in front of where their bed used to be was purple, the clothes basket was purple, the cloth covering the walk-in wardrobe was purple, the peach hand lotion from Marks & Spencers was still in the toilet.......AK's favourite colour is purple. Most touching of all was the wedding cake from Merchant Court that i found in the now empty fridge. The corsage was still on top of the cake box. Many years ago, after their wedding dinner, Jfk and me spent the night with the bride and bridegroom in the wedding room. The four of us squeezed onto the king size bed. The next morning, we had breakfast at the hotel's restaurant. We helped to carry the cake back to their house. Now, the sight of this same cake sitting alone in the fridge made me felt like crying. Both of them are hot headed, hot tempered and fiery. Both had so much love between them. 有爱才会有恨...深爱才会感到痛苦 :(

While JT, Jfk and KK were moving the luggages downstairs, i had to wait alone in the living room. Sitting alone there drained me of my emotions too. The memories of all the good & bad times flooded my mind. This was the living room that the five of us sat, discussing on what wedding songs to play for their first and second march-in. Should JT skate in, carry AK in, or do it the church wedding way. Then i could imagine the nights when AK sat alone in this same living room waiting for JT to come home. JT is in sales and he has to entertain almost every night. AK would wait, with fear, for him to come home because she knew he would be driving under the influence of alcohol. Then they would fight often because of this, plus other issues i guess. Perhaps loneliness also drove AK to the comforts of safer arms. Some marriages are just headed for doom...when there is a lack of communication, when there is no more 忍让 and 忍耐, when there is lots of built up angst and frustrations, when expectations began to differs and the gap widens, when love becomes lesser and anger is the prevalent emotion. Unlike in the olden days, once married, one got to stay married. Regardless of whatever reasons..one stick by each other "til death do us part".

The enchanting purple wall


The wedding cake in the fridge...


I was in charged of wrapping up all the glass/ceramic items with newspapers and packing his clothes into the luggage. By the time we were done, it was already 1pm. We made two trips moving everything to Yishun and had our brunch at 2pm+. At JT's parents' place, i caught a glimpse of a HK movie on TV about some housewives learning belly dancing. They were dancing with hip scarf and I MISS BELLY DANCING arggghhh Next week i shall scour through the internet for classes that suits my schedule.

After all the moving, i followed Jfk back to his office. While he was working, i went to get a facial. Both of us went for foot massage after that..to ease the muscle ache. Lucky i took a pain killer this morning..otherwise i couldn't have manage with all the heavy stuff.

Life goes on. Whatever goes down will always come up and everything happens for a reason. I am a firm believer in this...except that now, i also learnt to let God, trust God.